old friends

I held out on feeling nostalgic about high school for a long time, but it's finally hitting me. At the present moment, I am really missing high school. Ugh. I never wanted to be one of those people.

Part of me feels like I'm longing for simpler times. Thing is, I'm not sure whether those times were actually simpler or if that's just how I remember them. I had very few actual responsibilities, but on the other hand, everything that happened seemed so dramatic. And honestly, my life is almost definitely richer now - I have more going on, I live in a more vibrant place, I do more things.

I think maybe what I really miss is old friends, and the feeling of totally belonging somewhere.

year in review

2012 pros:
- had a good track season
- graduated
- moved to Boston and started a new job
- have a lovely Boston boyfriend
- won the Craigslist roommate lottery
- fully independent from my parents, money-wise

2012 cons:
- frustrated with my lack of career
- hard time making friends in Boston
- struggled with running consistently
- need hobbies other than going from Twitter, to Facebook, to Tumblr...

Looking forward in 2013 to:
- being a more active member of my club running team
- running a marathon
- starting to look for a "real job"
- Hawaii trip in February
- possible SF trip with Bryant

2013 anxieties:
- starting to look for a "real job"
- figuring out where to live once my lease is up in Sept.
- my grandma's failing health

2012 was a mixed bag. 2013 probably will be too. And so it goes!

Also,

maybe everyone feels this way, but I feel like I haven't done very much actual living. Despite the wonderful places I've lived, I am mostly lazy and content in my own little sphere of work-school-home. I feel like I should move out West and adventure, or even adventure here, but I don't know how to get started and I am too comfortable to be really motivated.

Scary, though, that I'm making the kinds of decisions that might turn into regrets for the rest of my life.

Sandy thoughts

You probably haven't heard, but there was a bit of a storm in New York this weekend...

Here in Boston, it was more of an adventure than anything. No one in my house had to go to work, so we:

• stayed in all day
• watched movies
• didn't lose power 
• and listened to the wind howling outside.

We were incredibly fortunate compared to New York. Most of my NYU friends have been without power all week, and some had to evacuate their apartments. Those whose families live in the city or on Long Island are coping with a lot of hurricane damage at home, as well.

I understand (as well as I can, given that I wasn't actually there) the gravity of their situation, and also that there is no harm in adding a little humor when life seems bleak. I am uncomfortable, though, with all the references to "refugee camps" where those who were evacuated are living. Yes, conditions are much worse than usual - no showers, either no beds or way too many beds in one room, no cell service or Internet or ways to charge one's electronics.

A refugee, though, is "a person who is outside his/her country of origin or habitual residence because he/she has suffered persecution on account of race, religion, nationality, political opinion, or because he/she is a member of a persecuted 'social group'." It implies real danger and pain and risk. So when people jokingly call the apartment in Brooklyn where they're piled in with 8 of their friends a "refugee camp," I can't help but think that we are yet again minimizing the very real and life-threatening problems that a large percent of the world actually faces. 

Being a refugee is a real and terrifying thing and one that should be taken seriously. I suppose I'm being overly PC here, but I think it's callous to refer to any NYU student as a refugee and that it shows a blatant disrespect for the real-world problems that many people, who are not as sheltered or fortunate as we, have to face.

The psychologist is in.

When I teach an LSAT class, one thing I like to do is to tell the students at the beginning of the course to email me about their goals, what they've been doing to study, and what other obligations they have (that might limit how much time they'll have to study). I tried this for the first time with my last class, and about half the class emailed me a quick note about their goal score.

I told my current class the same thing yesterday, and have so far received a couple responses.

Holy.
Shit.

Both emails are PARAGRAPHS long and jam-packed with personal info. I don't want to get too specific — I'm not trying to ridicule these people at all — but between the two emails, they've told me about neurological injuries incurred on the job, cheating ex-fiances, wives' Native American heritage, and basically their entire life histories. These are people who I've met twice, and my sole job is to teach them how to do well on this standardized test.

So, yes, there's definitely some oversharing going on here and I did get a little judgey about that. On the other hand, it makes me all that much more committed to help these people do as well as they possibly can on this test because I feel empathetic about the problems they've had.

Even wanting to help them on the LSAT, though, is a problematic goal for me. It feels a little like sending lambs to the slaughter - it kills me to know that even if I help this man get into his chosen law school, which considered a low-caliber school, he's going to graduate with heaps of debt and have an incredibly hard time finding a job. I want to tell him that he would have better luck seeking a different job. But, again, my only job is to help him do well on this test - not to judge his ambitions or suggest that he consider another career. So I'm torn between wanting to help in the small way I can, which is getting him to his goal score, and knowing that in the long run I likely won't be helping at all.

Every once in a while, applying for jobs is entertaining...

CASTING: Groups of Friends With Benefits! (All Boston)

Are you and your group of best friends in a tight knit circle with blurry boundaries when it comes to hooking up? Major cable network is looking for a dynamic group of early 20 somethings who reject strict sexual identities. Do you and your crew subscribe to the "anything goes" mentality? Are there multiple hook-ups within your group regardless of gender? Would you and your friends consider yourselves FLEXISEXUAL? We're casting a group of close BFFs who are open to try any identity on for size and together have been through it all.

Quick! Where are my flexisexual friends?!

I hate my neighbors.

I used to think that living next to college students had to be the most annoying living situation imaginable.

Oh, how I've been proven wrong. In September, a family with young children — about 3 of them, judging by the screams — moved in to the house next door. (In this case, "next door" means "about 6 feet away from my house.") And those little kids do NOT stop screaming. Ever. Seriously, no one in that house has heard of "inside voices." And I get that little kids tend to do that, but when it's happening at 6 am and sounds so close that it could be inside my room, I want to pull my hair out. I'm about to start throwing large ragers on weeknights just so I feel like there's a little quid pro quo going on here.